Apparently, I'm the new Magic Recycling Fairy at our hotel.
Some aspiring environmentally conscious member of the AM or PM crew decided to put all the empty bottles under the sink, where the Magic Recycling Fairy will come and take them away to Never Never Land. You know, where people never never do any actual recycling.
So, since I am the night guy, and I obviously have some time to keep a blog, I guess I can be the magic recycling fairy.
Speaking of which, I have to wonder exactly how environmentally evolved 4- and 5-star hotels have become. I'm currently at a 3-star, and we have very nice bathrooms... with ToIleT pAPErrr
Really, Japan is so far ahead of us. When I was in Japan, and I took a trip, I stayed at capsule-hotels, a hospitality phenomenon which has yet to hit the US (and I will make this happen). These capsule hotels are the cheap, low-end place to stay when you're in a crunch, and even they have bidets.
Bidets are cleaner, and they don't kill trees. Your ass will be absolutely shit-smear free. Whereas back in Uncle Sam Land, we still smear buttholes with ass-wipe; seriously, toilet paper has got to go. Just think of how many Americans are walking around with a halo of shit stain circumferencing their ani. That hot girl you saw on the street? Ya, she's a poopy-butt.
Japan is so far ahead in the game of recycling, thought, that I think all a huge country like America can do is give a depressing self-loathing shrug and think: "Hey, we're still cleaner than China."
And when I was in Shanghai last year, there were no restrooms in the subway; or they were just installing them at a couple of stops - and even those ones were the porta-potty out-house variety; kind of like "Honey Hole" which I see a lot of here in the Seattle.
If you are anywhere in Japan, and you need to take a dump or fizz a wizz, you do not need to worry; walk into any convenience store on any corner (except the red-light district of Osaka where too many drunks puke and piss all over the restrooms, so you can just go out in the alley).
In China? Forget it. A friend of mine saw a woman in the subway stand over to the far side of the platform, lift up her skirt, and pee into the tracks; whatcha gonna do? When you gotta go, you gotta go. And I thought America was better... Now it's me who has to tell random members of the public that they can't use our fancy hotel restroom. It's a real shame: We beat China in the sanitation department, but Japan still kicks our shit-stained ass.
And the toilet paper has to stop at the 3-stars. Any hotel that lacks bidets in every restroom has no right to the 4- or 5-star. Humans will soon look back and see toilet paper in the same way that we now see out-houses and holes in the ground. Toilet paper is uncivilized, primitive and just plain gross.
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